Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Attempted Rape

"When I tried to pass a banana to him, the chimpanzee grabbed my hand and pulled me into the cage and tried to rape me," said Valentina. She was only saved when her screams brought other keepers running. One keeper said: "It's a serious matter. If that had been a member of the public we would all be in court by now."


Source.

7 comments:

  1. Are the Russians going soft? I would think they would've summarily executed the chimp-- either by gunshot to the back of the head or, more clandestinely, poisoning with Polonium 210. Or put Vladmir Putin in the cage to do some crazy Judo shit to kick the chimp's ass. Maybe they need a show trial first-- make the chimp confess to the attempted rape and a whole bunch of other shit too.

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  2. Or just blame it on the Georgians.

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  3. Is there actually a blog for people like me who HATE chimps. Hate them. Hate them all. Worthless pieces of shit. Kill them all.

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  4. I'm with ChimpKilla and want to remind everyone that chimps started the spread of Rage virus in 28 Days Later. Proof positive--chimps are bad. Don't be chimp zombait.... xD

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  5. I want to see chimps getting killed by non-chimps. Can't find anything so far, anyone know a place to look? Thanks.

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  6. This is one of the greatest blogs to ever exist.

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  7. It would be very satisfying to shot hundreds of Chips in the head, burn them on fire then feed them to dogs. Kill them all!

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